Tangent: The Ubiquitous Apostrophe

Just a message to those who fancy themselves exotic.

Adding an apostrophe to your name does not make you look more interesting or unique.

Case in point: Er'nest and Na'Tasha. Just because you decided to pronounce it "all fancy like" doesn't mean your names aren't just Ernest or Natasha.

Or the even more frequent practice of adding an apostrophe to the end of your name, like Rhonda' and Joan'.

Please. I beg of you. Not only does this just make you or your parents look pretty dumb, but you are screwing up sql databases everywhere.

Get O'Ver it alrea'dy.

The Best Job Searching Strategy Ever!!

Let's just say you're applying for a job. This job allows you unfettered access to people's financial data. To even get your application looked at, you must pass a credit and criminal background check. Any aspect of the employment process requires your social security number.

Now let's say you are profoundly stupid and fail the skills test miserably. There is a one year waiting period before you can apply again. (This is because the pre-screen process is expensive to this very large corporation).

Do you:

a. Calmly wait for your next opportunity
b. Do "a" above and think about why you failed, vowing to improve next time.
c. Assume that you can fudge your social security number, fill out all that background check info with the bogus social security number, and try again immediately.

Let's say you're a Job Hunting Moron. You picked C. Dumbass.

You've been caught. You get a fairly innocuous note reminding you of the policies and that your recruiter has been notified.

Do you:

a. Feel embarrassed or ashamed
b. Have an "oh shit" moment and learn from it.
c. Despite what you feel about yourself or the situation, you do not respond, hoping that after a year you have dropped off their radar.
c. Respond to the person paid to verify security breaches such as this claiming complete innocence and put the cherry on top with "Take a chill pill bitch".

The unemployed insulting people doing their job, like the dumb chick above, is very laughable. Let me give you a clue, honey. Folks like the submitter and I don't get mad. We laugh our assess off.

Do YOU honestly think that someone like you, with a complete lack of class, professionalism and common sense even deserves to work with the public? People like you are so inherently stupid and tactless you will forever be stumbling from job to job, being fired for your dishonesty and poor people skills. A plus though, is that you'll get really good at filling out paperwork..............for unemployment benefits.

Edited to add: The husband of applicant sent this loving note: Go fuck yourself in the ass.